Wednesday, March 25, 2009


Hurt is the pain that eats away at my heart and makes me see the world through a filter of truth. Hurt is the passion that makes me live with the hope for eventual vengeance. Hurt is what sits in the pit of my stomach, waiting for me to acknowledge its power. Hurt is my shepherd, my comfort, my home. Hurt is what I feel every moment of every day. Hurt is what halts my laughter immediately after it's conceived. Hurt is what makes me hate the world.

Dating The Fantasy:

When you like a person, you constantly think about them. You imagine yourself in a fantasy, where you go places and do things together. Your lives together are perfect. He/she is romantic, loving, kind, and does exactly what you want when you want it. The only problem is, this person doesn’t actually exist. He/she is a projection of your idealized version of the person you like. What happens when he/she does something different from how you’d imagined? You start to lose a piece of your fantasy. You’ll either feel hurt that he/she isn’t doing what you want “anymore”, and perhaps try to change that person (which will not be well received). So, to start off, try to not imagine what it’d be like, or how good it would be. This is where an intuitive mind trying to analyze tons of possibilities becomes extremely harmful. Date the real person, not the fantasy.

The other thing that happens when you think about your future together too much is that you are analyzing too deeply down one branch of the possibility tree. Other parts of your life start to shrink because all your thoughts are focused on how good it would be together. You think about having kids, raising a family, sharing lots of romantic adventures together. However, these things are way in the future. That will only happen IF he/she likes you, IF you continue to like him/her, IF you decide to have a baby, etc. There are just so many things that can change that particular possibility. So then, what happens when you break up? All your planning has been focused on the two of you being together, so when the unexpected happens, you have no alternate plan! This is when people sit at home crying, blaming the other person for not fulfilling their dreams.

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